Have just answered phone thinking it might be CK ringing to laugh over email just shared. Instead quivery little old lady voice tells me she is from a local 'whale righting service'.
"Would you be interested in having your whale organised?"(quiver, quiver)
Because I could send you some information." (more quivering followed by obvious determination to be a brave bear.)
It was at this point I clicked she actually meant will NOT whale. I had been concerned as hilltops 30 mile inland are not good places for stranded whales to find themselves. (Although the plethora of hippies would undoubtedly be willing to assist them using crystals, ley lines and such.)