Sunday, 22 March 2009

50 things I have done while talking on the phone with my sister.

  1. set up a travel cot
  2. washed the kitchen ceiling
  3. pulled weeds
  4. washed dishes
  5. cleaned up vomit
  6. played with the dogs
  7. watched other people's children playing
  8. washed the kitchen floor
  9. made school lunches
  10. knitted
  11. stitched
  12. cried
  13. laughed
  14. hung out laundry
  15. ironed
  16. watched television
  17. read emails
  18. picked up dog poo
  19. wiped small people's bottoms
  20. wiped noses
  21. refereed fights
  22. disciplined small children
  23. left the room
  24. tied shoelaces
  25. brushed hair
  26. cooked dinner
  27. washed windows
  28. cleaned the loo
  29. arranged table-top activities for small people
  30. spoonfed small children
  31. danced
  32. burned cds
  33. copied photos
  34. baked
  35. peeled and cut vegetables
  36. breastfed
  37. felt unwell
  38. been in hospital
  39. stood beside a broken down car on the side of a road
  40. been mean
  41. cut toenails
  42. wrapped babies' bottoms in nappies
  43. bathed children
  44. photoshopped images
  45. doodled
  46. drawn donkeys
  47. loaded the washing machine
  48. fixed her knitting errors
  49. painted
  50. washed my hands.

I speak with Giovanna at least a few times a week. When something happens I phone her first. Or try to. Because my sister is a world traveller.

When I speak with her changes depends on the time zone she is in. When she lived on the West Coast of the US I spoke to her when it was teatime here. Then she went back to Australia and it was back to very late night or early morning chats. While they were living on the Continent it was free rein and we chatted often, sometimes several times a day. It has been known for CK to text or email her and ask her to hang up so he could call home ;-)

Now she is out on some "frickin' atoll" in the Pacific and the time difference means we have a window of approximately an hour at either end of the day to speak. We use this to great effect.

I spoke with her this morning and had to #23 because I had been #6 and #21 (the dogs) and it was all too noisy to hear. As I sat outside in the early morning sunshine I #13 so hard that I was gasping for breath and #12 tears of helpless mirth. Why? Because Giovanna confessed to me that her Saturday had been not all she hoped as she had stuck a knife in her eye.

I guess y'all aren't laughing but oh my word even as I type I am laughing out loud at the thought. How? How do you do that? Over my rib-aching laughter she told me that the nurse at the out-of-hours surgery discussed with her whether it should be classified as an 'emergency' or an 'accident'. They decided that it was something one wouldn't do deliberately and so could be placed into the 'accident' category!

Then she told me how the doctor said how lucky it was the blade was so sharp as the stinging pain probably stopped her going any further. WHAT!! Had it been a butter knife she may not have noticed and kept on moving forward onto it?

You know how sometimes when something is so dreaded or boring you might say 'I would rather poke myself in the eye with a sharp stick.' In between my tears of laughter and gasping breath I managed to assure her that at least now she would know if that was a truly fair comparison.

Giovanna (bless her) confessed that I was the first person she had told as it was quote an embarrassing story unquote. Being a thoughtful and kind sister I spoke with my nice brother just minutes later for his birthday and regaled both him and the golden s-i-l with the tale. What?! We are family, it is nice to share.


  1. That is just so mad! Love the idea that if it had been a butter knife she might have done more damage before she realised!!!

    Lucy x

  2. i was beginning to wonder if you'd done all those things in one phone conversation!!! some chat!!!!


  3. That is horrifying! I can't even imagine how she could accidently stick a knife in her eye... perhaps she was talking on the phone at the time?

  4. Thank you for sharing! I know I am a very bad person but it made me laugh, lots! My husband looked at me disbelieving when he asked what was so funny and I told him.

    I hope she is soon recovered and I really, really want to know how she did it!


  5. how DID she do that?

    (And remind me never to tell you about hoe I lit the toilet seat cover on fire - wouldn't want THAT to end up as a blog post!)

  6. I once dropped a knife off the kitchen top and cut my foot. So glad I'm not the only eejit in charge of a knife. And hope she heals very quickly. x

  7. OMG!! Your poor sister!! I'm like the others though ... I really would love to know HOW she managed to do that????
    Ya know, I've probably done a good slice of the things on your list whilst talking to my Mum on the phone he he. It's hardly ever less than a 1 hour call, and we live just 40 minutes apart LOLOL!! Aaah, we women sure can multi-task ;o).

  8. oh my.
    I once sawed thru a finger with a serrated knife trying to open a tube of glue.....1st night in my own flat.and no phone!!!
    It wasn't pretty.

  9. I just want to know how the heck she did it....but being the kind sister that you are, I guess that blog land will have to use its' imagination....

  10. 13, 13, 13, 13, 13 am I very twisted?

  11. We are all on tenter hooks waiting to hear all the lurid details of the "knife in the eye" story - whenever you are so inclined.

    OK, I thought the 50 things on the phone was all at one sitting until I got to the breastfeeding bit, I sort of figured it out (unless you breastfeed a really LONG time).

    Does sis have stitches, is her eye in a sling, does she have crutches or what?

  12. I think women are so good at this. Not only can we talk on the phone whilst cleaning up vomit, we can philosophise, mediate children and plan tomorrow night's menu! Love it!

  13. I was panicking at the absence of doodling but there it was....number 45. Phew.

  14. This just proves that we CAN multi-task!!

  15. OWCH!!! Glad she is ok!! x