Tuesday 15 February 2011

My rotten blurry Assistant

This morning I took destructoBoy to school and stopped up at Yukky Old Tesco to collect my phone which they rang me last night to tell me I had left there.

I was out of the house for about 25 minutes.

Only two dogs greeted me at the door on my return. The third was hiding upstairs.

When I went in to the living room I could see why.

Scraps of pink and red foil littered the carpet and a very forlorn mesh bag layed ripped on the floor. Not a scrap of chocolate in sight.

My assistant came down the stairs and tried to be my friend. Really really tried to be my friend. If she were a tall dog her paws would have been over my shoulders.

I turned away and rang the vet.

Apparently 75gm of milk chocolate inside a 10 kg dog is not a poison issue. Although I might want to keep her comfortable as her she may have a sore tummy.

There may have been a gasp of shock as I replied 'Good! I hope it hurts like hell.'

Now I have to tell d/Boy his secret chocolate Valentines are sitting inside the dog.

Rotten fecking blurry assistant

8 comments:

  1. When my furry friend was a pup he demolished half a pound of Belgian chocolates belonging to my eldest. The only ill effects he suffered was a lifetime terror said son. And he's never eaten chocolate since!

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  2. As a child I had a hamster who escaped and took one bite out of every chocolate in a box of Black Magic. Poor thing didn't last long :-

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  3. Oh dear! Poor puppy/Bad Dog!

    It could have been worse though - they might have been YOUR chocs!

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  4. BAD Sweet Puppy! I had to chuckle a little, although it's really not funny. Puppers just wanted a Valentine!

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  5. Oh Baaaaaad Dog!!!

    My brother's puppy ate a 200g bar of chocolate at about three months of age. Cost them over £150 at the vets for a v strong emetic drug that brought it all up again all over the surgery floor.

    The dog itself only cost them £100.

    At least your assistant had the good sense to hide so that you knew immediately she'd done something bad!

    xx

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  6. In my experience the High Intake Chocolate situation is rapidly followed by a High Output Vomit situation. Usually in the middle of the bedroom carpet or by the front door.

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  7. LOL my dog so far has eaten a kilo of cooking chocolate,a double pkt choc cake with a jar of nutella icing, bar of cooking margerine,whole tin of alcoholic fudge-scotch,whiskey,drambui(sic)rum-,he left the plain stuff !!, cotton wool,tin foil, embroidery thread-whole skein-,whole new pkt sanitary pads,lip-gloss' etc etc just 2 days ago he got into a friends handbag & ate a pkt chewing gum & a chocolate bar...only been sick twice !! no wonder we call him iron guts !!!

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